Speak up, man

It's not that I'm going deaf - far from it; it's just that sound isn't so loud these days. All right, I know I don't hear quite as well as when I was 20, but it's not that bad. I've always had a tendency to miss the first word of a sentence, which often makes the rest unintelligible, or at least, nonsensical. The big problem now is the tinnitus, like a constant hiss somewhere just behind me. I don't always notice it, so maybe it isn't always there, but I doubt that's the case.

Used to be, it appeared only after I'd had an evening on the laughing syrup, or a long drive, but now it's a fairly constant companion. Wake up, it's there; go to sleep, it's there. When I first realised it had come to stay, I felt a brief moment of panic: what if it tormented me all night, and I ended up insane? I soon realised that wasn't going to happen, and a visit to the specialist gave the comforting information that it would likely not get worse; on the other hand, there would be little I could do about it.

Fortunately, I don't notice it all of the time; usually, I am too busy concentrating on something, or the background noise is loud enough to block it out, but it's in the quiet moments that I hear it most. I don't care for the thought that I will be missing out on finer nuances of music, but then I never was much of an audiophile. These days, most music is heard while at the PC or in the car – neither of which are ideal environments – the opportunity for sitting just listening with the headphones on doesn't really exist these days (partly because No 1 son has managed to destroy a good Sennheiser set by neglect and abuse). Requests to buy him some new headphones now fall on deaf ears...